Thursday, July 2, 2015


When he uses you as a vessel.

My whole life I've always worked toward a goal. A clear path. I might stumble along the way but I would always keep heading for some kind of goal. As I reflect on the path that I have actually walked and not the one I thought I followed, I realize it is very different than what I set my sights on as a child. I wanted to be an doctor but the sight of blood and guts makes me sick, I wanted to be a lawyer but I could never afford law school, a flight attendant but I was too short by 3 inches. I wanted to move to new york, stay single forever, work 60 hour weeks in the corporate world and live off of Starbucks coffee but I got married, had child and moved back home.

Life is about choices. The choices we make. The choices we don't make. But what if all of that means nothing. What if God decides when and where you go everyday. What if he has and still does put you where you are meant  to be. What if life is a great journey and he is the guide.

I ponder this thought as I struggle with the next phase in my life. Where do I go from here? What choices are truly the right ones. Or should I just let my heart and love guide me. Should I let God just guide me. Is he already guiding me? I think so. I think that if I really look back at all the choices and the situations and the changes that happened to me through my whole life, I would see that he was there every step of the way. To teach me to be a better person, learn life skills, and learn to be patient until he decides to use me as a vessel for his next mission.

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